13 reasons why women find it hard to orgasm. How to get a woman to climax. Orgasm techniques, hindrances, FAQs.

Getting a woman to orgasm is a herculean task which requires experience and expertise.

Research has shown that barely 81.6% of women achieve orgasm during sex (without additional clit stimulation). Only 18.4% of women report that intercourse alone is sufficient to orgasm. This could be caused by numerous factors and that is what we will be discussing here in this article.

Reasons why women find it hard to orgasm

This is an experience common to only a few women. Most women however find it difficult to get to sexual climax (orgasm) and are most times clueless as to the reason behind that. Without lingering, here’s why:

Silence during sex

It is an established fact that women often determines how enticing a sexual act will turn out to be (inasmuch as both parties are in mutual understanding) through their sexual moans.

Keeping too quiet during sex would not only turn off the male, it will also make orgasm very difficult if not impossible to attain for the female.

Therefore, It is best to express your pleasure through erotic words or sexual moans when you come to enjoy a certain kind of hit or touch as this will help to heighten your pleasure and attain climax.

Lack of communication

One major area where most women fail during sexual intercourse is in lack of communication. Some women are traditionally passive partners, finding it difficult to express their sexual needs to their spouses.

In the very words of Dr Avani Tiwari – “If you don’t tell your partner what turns you on then how can you ever come to enjoy the beauty of an orgasm?” Men are not mind readers mind you, so the earlier you start talking about what turns you on, the better and quicker you start attaining orgasm.


In some cases where women come to have trouble coming to a sexual climax it could be caused by dehydration – lack of water makes the vagina dry.

This makes infiltration difficult. So, do take sufficient water all through the day so that the sliding in of the penis into the vagina can become easier and the parts of your vagina that stimulate can be accessed. Also keep in mind that liquor can cause dryness of the vagina.


Tall stilettos might look good on you but frequent usage of it could result to the deforming of your psoas muscle tissues situated in the lower lumbar region.

This psoas muscles have nerves that connect it with the genitalia, therefore the deformation of the psoas muscles could result to difficulty in orgasm as the nerves won’t be able to effectively transmit arousal signals which are necessary for orgasm.

Side distractions

Orgasm will certainly be hindered if you’re focussing more on other side distractions like the waving of the curtain, a newly developed spot on your partner’s body, etc instead of the actual act you’re in for.

Whenever you are about having a sexual moment with your partner, and realise that your mind is not focused, try deeming the lights or shutting the windows.

Hormonal issues

Another reason why women find it difficult to orgasm could be as a result of hormonal issues.

When the oxytocin hormone: the hormone responsible for the facilitating orgasm in women, becomes low, orgasm could be hindered. This could invariably be as a result of stress. One way to checkmate this is by having much foreplay before sex as this will help the oxytocin hormone levels to rise.

Trying too many sex positions

It is quite cool to experiment new sex positions, as it enables you discover more erotic or spicy ways to have sex, but too much sex positions at once, makes you lose the moment.

If both of you find a position that is satisfying then stick to it – the rhythm is what will give you a steady stimulation which will inturn create an atmosphere for orgasm. Experimenting too many sex positions can also effect getting orgasm.

Certain medications

Orgasms can also be hindered as a result of the kind of medication the woman takes. Usually, antidepressants and some blood pressure drugs have negative effects on orgasm.

Having a full Bladder

Orgasm can also be hindered in the woman when her bladder is full with urine. It is therefore recommended that you use the restroom before you get cosy with your partner in bed as an empty bladder will ensure much space for the secretion of the vagina fluids which contribute to great orgasms.

Lack of sexual connection with your partner

It is quite natural for humans to respond lovingly to people or things they connect well with.

The same thing applies to having an orgasm. If you do not have sexual connections with your partner, it would be best to avoid having sex with them as lack of sexual connection, will certainly make orgasm difficult if not impossible.


One of the reasons why orgasm is often delayed or denied in women is tension. Women are more emotional than logical creatures. When a woman is tensed: for any reason whatsoever, her body becomes irreceptive to sexual pleasure.

It is advisable to first ease your woman of her tensions or at least give her some sort of assurance that all will sorted out. In worst cases, avoid having sex with her for that moment. Look forward to making her feel at ease, show some care, ask her some questions about her recent challenges.

This will help soothe her mood and she’ll get more receptive to sexual pleasure and this helps towards achieving orgasm.

Note: As a woman, one sure way to attain orgasm is by first getting rid of all sort of tension from your mind.

Lack of foreplay

It is in the nature of most men to want straight ahead penetrative sex without any talks, while the reverse is the case with most women.

Women, on the other hand, need more foreplay to get adequately turned on and lack of adequate foreplay hinders orgasm.

How to get a woman to climax easily

13 reasons why women find it hard to orgasm

Penetrative sex alone doesn’t always do the magic behind orgasm, it needs to be coupled with other sensitive acts. Here are some of the things you should consider incorporating into your sex adventure when next you hit the bed.

Stimulate the Clitoris Frequently

The Clitoris is more like a medium of communication between the vagina and the Brain.

There are over 8000 nerve endings, connected to the clitoris. When the clitoris is caressed the brain ignites up the genital area, the flow of blood to the vagina increases, it causes vaginal lubrication, boosts oxygen and moderates temperature in the vagina.

Even in the course of penetrative sex, the man can use his hands to massage the clitoris in an anticlockwise direction. In the missionary position, the woman can have her legs closed while moving her hips in circular directions, either clockwise or anti.


According to Dr Avani Tiwari, having longer foreplays and allowing women take more active roles during intercourse increases her chances of getting an orgasm.

Create a romantic ambience

Try establishing a romantic environment, with a playlist of soft music, deemed lights, all phones switched off, aroma candles, etc. This will help build up the right mood in your woman, resulting to higher erotic sensations.

Relax, Don’t be in a Hurry

Let go of the anxiety. Instead of constantly thinking about whether you will achieve an orgasm or not, enjoy the entire process and don’t keep waiting for it to end. When you are relaxed you will be able to achieve your goal. A perplexed mind achieves nothing, calm your nerves and enjoy yourself and watch yourself get there.

Express your wants

Instead of waiting for your partner to become a mind reader and know exactly what you want, it will benefit both parties more if you start saying exactly what you want and how you want it.

To the woman, your man is not an automated mind readers, to help him get you to orgasm, you ought to let him know what you want.

To the man, allow your woman to determine the sex position that gives her more stimulation if you really want to get her to orgasm.

Carry out some slight exercise before sex

A tad of activity before sex will go far in assisting you with arriving at a climax. This is on the grounds that activity expands the measure of blood that streams into the cozy regions and along these lines will cause you to respond to sexual excitement all the more strongly.

Incorperate food Items

A few food sources are said to cause uplifted sexual excitement. Thus, next time you could attempt them. For instance, ice-cream, shellfish, nuts, or even red wine.

Study your body (Sexually)

You can jerk off as this will assist you with knowing your body better. So whenever you are engaging in sexual relations with your accomplice you will know what you truly need in order to get a climax.

Do some nasty moves

Use toys, speak profanely, knead each other, have oral sex – being a little shrewd will assist with keeping the state of mind light and furthermore will cause more prominent excitement.

Frequently asked questions about female orgasm


Is climax achievable after menopause?

Rarely. After menopause, the vaginal tissue gets more slender and furthermore drier. Because of this, engaging in sex often gets painful.

Likewise, in the wake of arriving at menopause, ladies experience changes in their hormonal design. Because of this, there is regularly a fall in the charisma level.

Lack of engagement in sex makes climax after menopause even more difficult to achieve. A few, nonetheless, feel that sensations are more enjoyable after menopause, basically in light of the fact that at that age there is no sort of fear for an unwanted pregnancy.

Are there orgasm prescriptions for women?

Yes. There are different orgasm drugs for women that can assist with having orgasm but it is very much vital that you consult a specialist, and get sufficient information on the advantages and disadvantages prior to proceeding with such a treatment.

Likewise, a lady suffering from different issues like uneasiness and sadness, ought to be given medical attention as all these will come to meddle with her capacity to have a peak if not properly handled.

What kind of food items can be used during sex?

It all depends on what you’re trying out. Ensure not to use peppery stuffs, you know why. It is best to stock sex arousal foods like keeping a supply of chocolate sauce to switch on the warmth. Rather than licking the sauce from a plate, pour it over her twins and gradually lick it. Think about youghurts, cakes, berries, nuts, etc.

This is an expert key that will touch off freshly discovered enthusiasm in her. In conclusion try creating an intimate intercourse, don’t just have sex.

Always remember this tip if you want to keep getting your partner to orgasm – Ladies love to be cherished first before getting stripped for an all out lovemaking meeting. Sentiment with her, cause her to feel exceptional before you begin investigating her body.
This will guarantee that she is totally immersed in bed with you.

If you must satisfy your woman in bed, you must first know her soft zones. You must have benefitted from this article, help your friends and family to benefit likewise.

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